Have you ever seen the movie Uncle Buck? If you haven't, you need to, and I'm so sorry about your sad and meaningless childhood. The movie features a fabulously large John Candy and a precocious, Home Alone era Macaulay Culkin. It's a classic. Anyway, there's a scene where the six year-old little sister Maisy tells her teacher about Uncle Buck (John Candy) using their microwave to dry his socks.
TEACHER: "Why was he drying his socks in the microwave?"
MAISY: "Because he can't get the Goddamn washing machine to work."
TEACHER, waving a ruler in his fist: "BLASPHEMERRR!"
I guess you just have to see the movie.
Anyway, our washing machine just shot the pooch on me. It won't turn on, and the safety lock mechanism on the door is stuck shut. So not only can I not wash my dirty clothes, I can't even get them out of the machine. It's pretty awesome. The hubs is upstairs working his mechanic magic on it though, so it should be all better soon if it's built anything like a car or motorcycle. Hmm.
I'll let you know how it goes.